Tuesday, May 09, 2006
Bigus and Madeira to Duel
Who's the Biggest Sportsman
With no other way to solve their differences, Madeira and Bigus have decided to duel to determine who's the biggest sportsman. Madeira started the disagreement, claiming he once shot a fourteen pointer, arrowed a six pointer, and clubbed a four pointer, all in the same season.
Bigus countered with an assertion that he once downed a bear and and elk with one shot (although conspiracy theorists believe there was a second shooter.) Senator Arlen Specter has come down on Bigus' side, saying that one bullet could have killed both animals. Pat Toomey, a well known Madeira supporter, immediately countered by saying such a "magic bullet' could not have killed both animals and believes there may have been a CIA connection.
On information received by Buzz the Intern, it appears the duel will take place Saturday morning on the west bank of the Susquehanna, just below Shickshinny. Haggerty will act as Madeira's second for the duel and Baker will act as Bigus' second. It is rumored that Sutton will take some time off from his relentless door-to-door effort to sell tickets to the event to raise money for his cash starved campaign. McNamara, a "Just Say No To Dueling" advocate for many years, says he will not attend.
No got it all wrong again. Ms. Baker is arranging for a grant as we speak for this event but is getting permission first from the Most Reverened Charles D. "Rusty" Flack (Hal, please call your office) to hold the event. Mr. Haggerty will not serve as a second as it is beneath his dignity. He did state that he will be available to represent the injured party and will showcase Joe Quinn's ability to collect. Please just leave Mr. Sutton out of this because he really does not know what is going on and is busy making his brew.
Nice pictures on the front of the Times Leader. These two are certainly fine candidates for the senate.
How long have Madeira and Haggerty been "teamed up"? Norton, you should know the answer since you are a close friend of Haggerty....it is no secret.
I consider myself a close friend of all of the candidates, not just Haggerty. The picture in this post is from the 200th anniversary re-enactment of the Hamilton/Burr duel. Buzz and I actually attended the event in July, 2004 in Weehawken, New Jersey.
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